A More Disciplined Life

Since Eli was about 4 weeks old he has lived a very disciplined life; I have kept him on a schedule even when ridiculed for doing so, he has eaten fruits and vegetables and practically NO sugar even though there has been ridicule for that also, and there are things that he isn’t allowed to do; we try our best to make sure that he is living within very healthy, safe boundaries. People have called us crazy, told us to give in, don’t let him cry it out, don’t take away his pacy, don’t keep him on a schedule, give him sugar, let him eat that, let him do that… even in the face of peer pressure, we have stood strong. The result? A baby who sleeps almost 12 hours per night, takes a 3 hour nap in the afternoon, who is happy about 95% of the time, eats his veggies and LOVES fruit, and who has very quickly learned the word “no”. While this might seem like a brag session, it’s really not! My point is actually the complete opposite of bragging… my point is more a question, why is it so hard for me to lead a disciplined life when it comes so natural for me to keep Eli’s life so disciplined? I mean, Eli is on a schedule, has a very good diet, and knows what “no” means… all of the structure and discipline in his life really makes his life positive and happy! I see the discipline in his life and the positive results and yet, I find it so hard to add discipline to my life. I know that eating better, going to the gym, and taking better care of myself will yield a happier, healthier, and yes, sexier me; all of which are important to me and yet I lack self-control and discipline!

This occurred to me the other night at Dairy Queen of all places… Eli rarely has sweets and by rarely, I mean almost NEVER to my knowledge!! So, we thought after his very healthy dinner and playtime outside that a few bites of ice cream would be a nice treat after a hot summer day. So, off to Dairy Queen we went and a few bites of ice cream is exactly what he had. The funny thing is that after about 5 teeny tiny bites of vanilla ice cream, which he thoroughly enjoyed, he was finished and said “up”. Up is Eli’s word for done and signifies that he wants out of his highchair. My 13 month old son exhibited self-control!! Not that he knew what he was doing but he knew that he had enough ice cream and he was done. He ate his treat and that was simply enough… he didn’t need a gigantic portion. Lesson to be learned here… Mommy needs to live a more disciplined life!!! Mommy needs to learn self-control!!

My plan to lead a more disciplined life... I bought some apples at the store tonight and tomorrow I’m going to eat one in my lunch that I will be taking from home, not purchasing at a restaurant. I will also be visiting the gym for at least 30 minutes instead of telling myself the same old excuse that I don’t have time!

“The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and SELF CONTROL” Galatians 5:23

Here are a few pictures from our DQ treat and from our Memorial Day!!

Failing... more importantly, trying again!!

The bottom line is, life is about learning, whether you’re in school or not. We are human. We make mistakes. But your lowest moment might also be the one where you begin to rise, and rise. So double back. Regroup. Brush yourself off, and try again. -Sarah Dessen

I failed today. Remember that words test that I have been desperately trying to take before I ever open my mouth? Well, I have been doing 90% better at keeping things to myself because of that test. Today, however, I let my emotions get the best of me... I spoke out of anger, frustration, and to tell you the truth insecurity and fear! Not only did I fail to do the words test, but I failed to abide in Him, to listen to the truth of Him instead of the lies from the author of lies. In doing this, I didn't glorify God, I didn't present my best self, and as a result, I felt guilty, embarrassed, and about 2 feet tall!!

Then, I did what the quote at the top of this page says; 'I regrouped, brushed myself off, and I'm ready to try again!" My lowest moment today WAS the moment that I began to rise. I remembered that I am a daughter of the most High God. That He loves me beyond my imagination and that all I needed to do was to take a step back, humble myself, ask Him to forgive my human error, and ask Him to help me abide in Him and to do my very best to glorify Him.

Again, here is my prayer: "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer." If you, like me, failed today... know that you don't have to wait until tomorrow to have a clean slate... right now you can have a conversation with your creator, because the truth is that the next moment is clean and free of mistakes... PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!

Random Thought From Today: NOTE TO SELF... when allowing your toddler to "feed" himself with his spoon... purchase painter's sheets and cover the dining room floor and anything else in said toddler’s path!!

XOXO... thanks for reading my thoughts, moments of failure, and moments of victory! :)

1st Mommy Day of the Summer

I love my job... not everyone can say that they get to go to work everyday and do something that they enjoy; but I can. I am the Director of Children's Ministries at CFUMC and basically what that means is that I plan, work in, organize, and anything else you can think of in all things relating to children birth through 5th grade. I love all of His kids and I LOVE watching them grow and mature in Him. All that being said, it's A LOT of work and at certain times it can get very busy and stressful just like any other job. Springtime is one of those times when it gets busier... winding down the school year and cranking up the summer requires a lot of planning, time, and mental energy. So, today, I took a breather!!!... my favorite kind of breather... a day with my favorite little boy in the world, my son, Eli!! I'm sure that all of my Mommy friends who work outside the home (**kuddos to my friends who work in the home... you guys have a tough job!) can relate to that feeling of being torn, no matter how much you love your job, everyday that you go to work you feel that twinge of guilt and you desperately miss your baby!! I was in need of a Mommy day... a day just for the two of us to hang out, laugh, and play... a day filled with lots of hugs, kisses, and giggles!! I have to tell you that I am more refreshed after today with my munchkin than any day off I have ever spent alone!! I just wanted to share a few pictures from our wonderful day!

Everyday begins with a good breakfast!

 Riding on his toy... more like dancing on his toy to the music of the toy next to it!!

 Pool time!!! Thanks Kelly for hosting us! We had a blast!

 Taking a yogurt bite break... swimming makes a boy hungry!

 After naptime... E tried blackberries for the very first time... he LOVED them!!!!

 Eli did this all on his own! He wanted to play peek a boo with Mommy!

 Peek A Boo!!!!!

 and again....

 Bathtime.... Duck, Duck, Duck, Duck

 Trying to wear P-Maw AND P-Paw's sunglasses!!

 So glad that Daddy got to join us for supper and the softball game!

Thanks for reading thoughts from my Mommy heart!! XOXO

Seeking... TRUTH

All of my life I have gone to church, I have listened to what I believed was sound doctrine, I have studied the Word as best I knew how, and I would debate to the ends of the earth that I knew that I knew that I knew exactly what each passage of scripture meant. I have always been taught a version of the passage from 2 Timothy 2:15 which reads, "Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth.” most of you are probably familiar with the jest of the scripture that I heard quite a bit... "Study to show yourself approved!” No one was wrong in telling me to do this, the thing that I am beginning to realize however, is that I wasn’t sure exactly how to do that or what to do with the knowledge that I gained.

My new search for truth began in October of last year. A very dear friend of mine was hit with a tragedy that left everyone around her in shock, deep grief, and doubt. Not doubt in God, but rather in doctrine. I began to look for truth, not man made beliefs or summaries from the Word of God but truth.

I have been learning over the past several months that if you really want to understand the Bible you have to remember that the Bible wasn't written to the American public... it was written in a very different time, in a very different culture. Someone I greatly respect has told me that you should ask three questions when you read a passage of scripture: 1) what did it mean for the people then? 2) What does it mean to people now? 3) What does it speak to me personally? Much thought and prayer should go into studying the Bible and discerning what God is saying to you. Don't misunderstand me, I'm not saying that the Bible isn't true or that it is in anyway obselete... my purpose in writing any of this is to say that I'm learning that I have to study to show myself approved so that I won't be ashamed and so that I can correctly explain the Word of truth.

I am embarrassed and ashamed to say that I haven't studied God's word enough to answer a lot of questions that are asked... I have come to realize that most of what I think I know are things that I have been taught, some which are true; but some which are not. I have decided to study and pray to find truth and answers. I encourage you to do the same, don't just take someone's word for it... dig into God's word, humble yourself in prayer and find the truth.

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with your whole heart" Jeremiah 29:13

Random Thought for the Day: I wanted to share some pictures from our family date to the Bainbridge boat basin this weekend. We had a great time with our precious blessing!

Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?

 Is there anyone else out there who has the tendency to speak before thinking? How about speaking out of anger, frustration, or hurt? I know this all too well!! I like to call it Open Mouth insert Super Huge Foot Syndrome! What's worse than the actual words spoken is the guilt that comes after speaking them! I have lived this way most of my life. I have said what I wanted to say, when and how I wanted to say it. I have improved it a little over the years but to be quite honest, it's something I still struggle with!!

I was introduced to a "words test" a week or so ago by someone who's advice I value and take seriously. He said that before words ever leave your mouth, you should ask yourself, is what you're about to say true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? After taking a rather long and not so good look at myself, I very honestly admitted to myself that yes, my words are mostly true but not very often are they kind, and even less often are they necessary. So I was faced with a choice, continue living the way that I live, saying what I think, reacting out of anger, harming my personal and professional relationships; or, I could embrace this new way of thinking and change. Hmmm....

Could it be that easy? Could I change just by asking myself three questions before I speak? It sounds great, but is it possible? The Bible tells us that the tounge is a whole world of wickedness that consumes the whole body... that tells me that taming my tounge and changing my words is going to be quite a feat!!! However, the Bible also tells me that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Answer: It isn't going to be easy but I can change the way that I speak by drawing strength from Christ and by doing the words test before I speak!!

So let's ask ourselves, "is it true, is it kind, and is it necessary?" before we speak. If our words don't meet all of these criteria, then we are better off to keep quiet. If everyone took the test, I think the world would not only be a quieter, kinder place, but we might be able to completely do away with mindless, hurtful gossip!!

My prayer is found in Psalm chapter 19. "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer." Psalm 19:14.

Thanks for reading my thoughts!!

Random Thought of the Day: I saw tie dye balloons for the first time and I think they are incredibly cool!!

Blogs

I've never had an interest in blogging... I journal, sporadically, but never gave blogging a thought. However, I decided that blogging my thoughts and experiences at this point in my life might be fun and even theraputic!! I have friends whose blogs are deep and meaning full, some whose are just fun, and some that are for the soul purpose of keeping friends and family updated on their lives. They are incredible writers and their blogs have purpose. If that's what you're looking for, I'm not sure that you will find it here. Most people that know me at this point in my life don't know that I'm really random, fun, and I enjoy spontaneity. I have a very full and busy life that doesn't allow for a lot of randomness and spontaneous activity; this blog is going to be sort of a window into the fun, random, and spontaneous person that I am... an unclouded account of me!

I am a woman, daughter, wife, mother, director, student.... Many roles, many hats to wear. This blog will be about me and how I wear my different hats. Hopefully it will be the account of the journey that I am taking as I follow Jesus and learn how to wear each hat with grace, confidence, and strength. My desire is to serve Jesus Christ with everything that I have and to become more and more like Him.

If you choose to follow this blogging journey that I have chosen to embark on; I will welcome you with open arms. I pray that the one thing that you take away is that I am on a path to discovering who I am in Him and what that means...

Random thought of the day: Does anyone know where I got the phrase: "oy with the poodles already"??