Twenty Six ~ Fresh Start ~ New Leaf ~ Lessons Learned

I have had a wonderful birthday! I love when my birthday falls on Easter, I truly feel that it's a special present from God to me... because, I'm His favorite! (and so are you!) Twenty-six... A number I have been dreading for the crazy reason that I am now on THAT side of 30! However, I have had a change of heart; actually, I've been experiencing a change of heart over the past few months. I have often viewed my life as not enough, not what I had exactly anticipated, certainly filled with bad choices thrown in there with incredibley good ones. I have pretty much always gone against the grain... to the beat of my own drum! I have felt recently that my life has included a lot of failure; I haven't yet graduated from college, I'm overweight, my husband and I have debt that we need to pay off, and there are things that happened in the past year that satan tried to use to solidify these feelings of failure and lack of purpose and destiny. But God... God sees me for who He created me to be. He created me for His purposes, for a destiny that I am discovering daily as I seek His face. I'm learning that it doesn't matter what the world says about me, it doesn't matter what some friends or family say about me, what matters is what God says about me. Quite honestly, if the people in my life aren't supporting God's view of me and encouraging me to seek Him and become all that He has for me, if they are fueling the flame of failure rather than the flame of success, if they are pulling me in the wrong direction, then it's probably a sign that they don't need to be in my inner circle. I am learning that with age (most of the time) comes wisdom and I have decided that life is just too short. Too short to worry about who's talking about me. Too short to worry about who doesn't like me or something I do. Too short to worry about every single detail. Too short to spend time with people that drag me down. Too short to do anything less than live a life pleasing unto God!!

One of the biggest mistakes I have made in my life is that I let life pass me by. I neglect the moment and before I know it, the moment has passed. Well, not anymore! I am determined to savor each second God blesses me with life, to enjoy life's smallest gifts, to listen to my son's every noise becasuse all too soon, he won't want Mommy to to attend to his every need. I am determined to love my husband and respect him as the man of God that he is, to value our marriage as holy and sacred before the Lord and to be thankful that we found love so young! I am determined to live my life on purpose!

26 will be my best year yet! I've already begun a process of change. Change in my mind, change in my lifestyle, change in my body, and even change in wardrobe! I'm allowing God to do a work on the inside and on the out. I already made mistakes today in my journey of becoming all that I can be but tonight as I type this, I can say with purness of heart that I have no unforgiveness because I called a person that I have been harboring unforgiveness towards, humbled myself, and asked for forgivness and offered it. That makes me free to be forgiven of my sins and mistakes. Glory to God! I've learned that life is 10% of what happens to us and 90% of what we make it!! I'm going to make this year great inspite of what comes my way... I already know that this year has to be better than last year because through the trials and tears of this year, God has made my skin thicker, my spirit stronger, and my heart more full of compassion! Watch out world... this year will see a growing me... I will be shrinking in size physically but growing in size spiritually!! God is going to do amazing things... all for His glory!

Just a couple of photos to show the outward tranformation that has taken place since my last birthday and lyrics to a song that sums it up!

 Me and Mr. Eli last year on my birthday!

 Me and Mr. Eli this year at my birthday celebration!

 Me with my sis Kayla

 Me with my sister Shelley!

Me with the most wonderful husband that a girl could ask for!!

There's some things that I regret,

Some words I wish had gone unsaid,
Some starts,
That had some bitter endings,
Been some bad times I've been through,
Damage I cannot undo,
Some things,
I wish I could do all all over again,
But it don't really matter,
Life gets that much harder,
It makes you that much stronger,
Oh, some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were,
Lessons learned.

[Chorus:]
And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,
Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,
Every change, life has thrown me,
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,
I'm grateful, for every scar,
Some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were lessons learned.

There's mistakes that I have made,
Some chances I just threw away,
Some roads,
I never should've taken,
Been some signs I didn't see,
Hearts that I hurt needlessly,
Some wounds,
That I wish I could have one more chance to mend,
But it don't make no difference,
The past can't be rewritten,
You get the life you're given,
Oh, some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were,
Lessons learned.